The bottom of a better ladder

In April 1992, I found out I was pregnant with Brent. I was 17 and a junior at Goddard High School. 

The first item on my to-do list was to drop out of school. 

I'm not sure why I thought that. There were only two months of classes left, and it was still early in my pregnancy. But I was already living with my boyfriend, the father, and I was ready to get my "real life" started. 

Over the summer, I spent some time with my friends, two of which were also pregnant. We were all due in December. As a group, we decided to finish our senior year. I enrolled and went to my first day of school five months pregnant and in maternity clothes.

The other students never mocked me or treated me bad. The pregnancy was more of a novelty than anything else. I don't know what people were saying behind my back. But to my face, everyone was curious and nice.

My due date was Dec. 11. I believe it was a Friday. I remember sitting in my government class when someone asked me when I was due. 

I said, "Today."

I got a wide-eyed reaction. That is when I realized I didn't want to known as the girl who gave birth during second period.

Even though Brent refused to come for another two weeks, I decided I was ready for my maternity leave.

Brent was born Dec. 25, 1992. 

When the new semester began in January, I took advantage of the six-week tutoring provided by the school so I could stay home with my new baby. It went well and my grades looked great. However, when the personal tutoring ended, and "real life" went into full effect, life got much more difficult.

Brent's dad, my husband at this point, worked second-shift. So I went to high school during the day and took care of Brent by myself at night. 

Homework? Not really.

I don't know how long I kept this schedule, but soon I dropped out of high school AGAIN.

A year later, Charley was born.

A year and half later, Allie was born.

A year later, we were headed to a divorce.

That is how I had three children and no college degree at 20 years old.

I went in and out of the workforce several times.

As an adult and mother, I have been:

a cashier for one of Davis-Moore's service departments

a Pizza Hut cook and shift supervisor

a factory worker making automobile pinstripes

a donut maker and deliverer

a photo printer

a high school secretary

I know it sounds glamorous, but trust me it wasn't.

During my time as a secretary, I went back to school to work on my degree. I took one or two classes at a time. I was making progress, but it was slow progress.

Three years ago, I quit my job to be a full-time student. I took heavy loads, sometimes 18 or 19 hours at a time, to try get done as soon as possible. I had a significant setback in January 2007. My dad died on the second day of the spring semester. I couldn't do it. I couldn't handle it so soon, so I took the semester off.

But now I have the graduation stage in my sights. I will be done in two semesters, which finally gets me to my point.

My byline

I understand how small this byline is in our giant world of bylines.

I'm not a new Wichita Eagle employee. I'm not even the new part-time employee. I'm an intern, a nobody, a nothing. I wear a visitor tag and park in customer parking.

But on the other hand, this is huge. I've worked really hard for it.

I recently interviewed a man from Africa who is in Wichita to attend graduate school at WSU. He has overcome far more difficult obstacles than teenage pregnancy. But I can relate to something he said.

"The temptation to give up and just go and sleep was strong," he said.

I didn't give up, and I didn't go to sleep.

Now I am at the bottom of a tall and unfamiliar ladder. But it is the nicest ladder I have ever seen.